For starters, Sansa didn’t have a lot of control on her life and destiny at the beginning of the story not because she was stupid or weak (she definitely wasn’t and still isn’t any of these two things), it’s a result of institutionalized and systematic sexism that puts women in these kinds of roles where they don’t get to have a say in their fate. It’s scary that so many people don’t get that and instead, they blame and hate on this preteen girl for not having any control on her future.
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life is not a song 