cleverjonquil:

I completely agree. I don’t know where the general fandom gets the idea that Sansa was the spoiled queen bee of Winterfell everyone fawned over while Arya and Jon were punished daily for just existing. Compare how a grand total of 5 people liked her more than them vs how Jon is immediately put in leadership roles or how Arya is preferred by their brothers, father, servants, and made a lot of friends down South. Arya was the popular girl who fit in perfectly. (And it’s also interesting how they say Sansa isn’t Stark-y enough AND simultaneously is the jewel of WF who fit in perfectly lol, so which is it?)

Cat was closer to her, Jeyne and Beth were her bffs as they were the only kids her age who didn’t- y’know- mock her interests, Mordane preferred her (the hardworking student who didn’t make trouble? What teacher would like that?!), even Theon prefers her for shallow reasons. This is seen as despicable to some fans, because their faves are the ones entitled to everyone’s love! Even a handful of people who genuinely like her sweet personality is too many.

It’s actually thanks to Sansa being the first born that Arya gets so much freedom. As an oldest daughter, it’s expected of her to be the example, to excel in her studies and prepare for her role as a lady. She wasn’t given the privilege to be indulged as her little siblings. That’s a lot of pressure.

So mix that pressure to be perfect with the favoritism her relatives show each other over her and boom, insecurities. Girls seeking attention they didn’t get from neglectful (if loving) fathers will often turn to the wrong men (ie her romanticizing Joffrey and Sandor’s abuse). Where do you think her need for validation came from? Not Cat!

Speaking of Ned, I do love him but he unthinkingly threw her to the wolves lions. He let Bran and Arya get away with disobedience but lets her think she’s being punished by killing Lady when he didn’t have to then with no warning or explanation breaks off the best engagement she could ever have (but still never prepares her for being handed over to the Lannisters??) Do I doubt that Nedder Butter loved her? Of course not. But parents who let you down often do!

Sorry that turned into a rant but it’s a topic that really angers me on the fandom’s part in how they ignore or dismiss Sansa’s neglect and hurts me on Sansa’s. Like that scene where she runs in terror while her siblings have a warm moment together laughing, nobody caring enough to go give her a hug and tell her it was only jon. 😦 It feels at times that she cares more about them than they do her. But I can’t really add anything else, because you pretty much nailed it all.